The Sock Awakening.

Whites and Darks.

Necessary when doing laundry, divide and conquer your load. Laundry is one of the few things in society that has made little progress in segregation reform. Was Dexter Holland right? Do you got to keep 'em separated.

I was doing some laundry today when I noticed something. All socks are not created equal. In one corner of the hamper; functional, thick, and pale (in comparison), I present to you the Athletic Sock. In the other corner of the hamper; smooth, vibrant, and stylish, the Dress Casuals. Two titans of toe topping, these practitioners of podiatric pleasure got your back by covering your feet. This is a war. But I didn't realize the implications.

For years too embarrassingly long to count, I was a white sock guy. I didn't do it out of irony or because I admired David Letterman, I just really never thought about socks. These white socks were comfortable, so I'll just go with these. Besides, you wear dark colored socks with suits and polishable shoes. They were too thin and flimsy to be comfortable. They were something for a school uniform. So I was king cotton and apparently always ready for an impromptu game of 1-on-1.

I wore white socks. Tube socks, crew socks, ankle socks, socks that went half way up my shins. White socks. Crisp and clean.

Wore them as a kid. Wore them as a teenager. Wore them in college. Wore holes in them.

I thought it pretty regular a practice for a guy to wear white socks so I never second guessed my choice. I was in a blissful ignorance. You may find this hard to fathom, but I never noticed a male peer of mine not wearing white socks until I was a 19 year old college student. That was the first year I roomed with my friend Dave.

Dave only wore white socks when the particular athletic function called for it. Really? I don't think Dave owned more than three or four pairs of white socks. No, he had solids in deep hues, classic stripes, and some of brighter varieties. There were probably some other patterns thrown in there too, but I didn't spend my hours procrastinating looking at my roommate's feet.

It was an epiphany. Not as dramatic as I make it sound, but definitely eye-opening. It didn't change the world as I knew it, but it was definitely a "hmmm" moment. These socks didn't have to be the thin and dainty dress socks I had lumped all non-whites in with. There was a colorful world out there, a world that called for a starkless sock.

Soon, room was made in the drawer for some new socks. The familiar white socks remained, but they now mingled with many other shades. No longer a uniform mass, a new chromatic cornucopia commenced.

It's has been many years since. Now I have a home that I share with my beautiful wife. An idyllic existence you would assume. I'm sorry to say that all is not right though. No longer is my sock drawer the utopia it once was. On the north side of the room in the high dresser and nestled next to the boxer shorts reside the colored socks. On the south side of the room in the low dresser next to the undershirts rest the white socks.

I didn't realize what I had done until today. Not while separating the loads before heading downstairs. Not when they were ushered into their respective washers. Not while folding my freshly clean wares. It wasn't until I was putting my socks away that I noticed. That is why I am writing this. For so many years I blindly felt one way, until college changed that. In the years that followed, I thought I had become a different person. But today I find myself confused. Has all progress ceased? Has Plessy vs. Ferguson reared it's ugly head in my laundry basket? What now? What moved me to separate the two? So many questions.

It may sound silly, but if you look deep enough society is reflected in all we do. Am I being extreme? Perhaps. While I tend to doubt that I express my prejudices in the sorting and storage of my clothing, it is interesting to realize how comfortable we become in our beliefs, blindly accepting things as we always have. I was unaware about my socks. Maybe you are unaware about your bus stop or your country club. Maybe we should all be more aware and put our best socked foot forward.